Oh well, this is how I would say it. But it is only my suggestion.
EDIT #1: by David Croft
I am hope,
up in the sky so bright.
I am a bear,
standing tall - upright.
I am a mountain peak
shining - sparkling light.
I am the sun and
will never go away.
I am the wind and
can sweep you up with
I am a star
and where there's darkness
I will shine.
I am a river
of life with some bruises hidden.
I am a lion,
knowing only success.
I am the earth
and will not be moved.
I am a giant
that must be looked up to.
I am the key
that will open your heart,
and bring you
This is an edited version of I'm that star up in the sky!
Thank you for visiting my web site, Xeximian.com. It is a web site for poets and storytellers with REAL AUDIO on it so that people can actually hear the poet read in his or her own voice.
Your poetry is both interesting and honest. It is wonderful to see how young people such as yourself can turn to poetry to help themselves through a crisis in life. Most adults have short memories -- they have forgotten how hard it is to be 12, 13, 14, 15, 16 and 17 years old. I remember those years as some of the most difficult times of my life. Yesterday you were just a happy kid playing fantasy games and just doing what your parents told you, and then WHAM, BAM, BADABING - BADABONG - BADABAM! Today you are a young woman thinking about boys, sex, money, the looming future of life, how you look, how other people see you, whether you are a bad person or not, how to be popular, whether to drink and do drugs with the rest of the crowd or to be your own person. When things get rough then you start asking yourself, "AM I A LOSER? IS LIFE ALWAYS GOING TO BE THIS BAD?"
Being a teenager is VERY HARD !!! I want you to give yourself a lot of applause for holding fast to your faith and being yourself. Do not let go of that ---- EVER ! Also, and I want you to read this EVERY DAY and recite it to yourself when things get rough:
"IF TODAY GOES BAD THEN TOMORROW WILL COME AND I WILL HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE. IT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO KNOW EVERYTHING AND IT IS OK FOR ME TO MAKE MISTAKES. IF I AM HONEST BEFORE CHRIST THEN I AM HONEST WITH ALL PEOPLE"
Those words will help you if you ever need some confidence. They have helped for me and I still recite them all the time.
NOW FOR SOME HELP WITH YOUR SITE:
Marie, I have noticed that you have quite a number of spelling errors in your poetry. No big deal, but you might want to clean that up by using SPELL CHECKER on your text editor. If you would like some help with that please e-mail me back. From your picture I also see that you are very pretty! Give yourself credit for that too. God made you pretty so don't forget to thank HIM too.
Lots of love & Huggs,
And I loved the poem that you sent. It really made my day, which was a hard one.
God loved us all so much that he sent His Son to be killed for our sins. Whenever I think of that I dream of how much all the early Christians suffered under the Romans and the early enemies of the Christian church.
Young women are so special in God's eyes, because they are the future mothers of all men. Sex was not meant to be some kind of sport, or passtime. It is a holy endeavor in the eyes of God. But we all want immediate gratification so much, due to the loneliness and pain of the world, that we forget to treat the treasures that God gave us as sacred things. This is the modern problem with both men and women today. They have lost sight of how important they are to God, and how much He loves them.
May God's love be showered upon you and all your family Marie. I am sure that your life will be a testimony to goodness.